Black Kids in a White Church

by | Aug 23, 2022

Counted the cost and still concerned

Black Kids in a White Church? Every Christian has counted the cost of following the Lord Jesus (Luke 9:23–24)—the sacrifices to make, the suffering to endure—and has rightfully considered that Christ is worth it (Romans 8:18). When it comes to choosing a local church to join, especially if one joins a church where he’ll be the minority, he has to count the cost of this decision as well: both physical and cultural loneliness.

I’m a black man, and I pastor a majority white congregation. I love the congregation I get to pastor, I’m continuously encouraged by them, and I’m confident this is where the Lord has me. Though my family has already counted the cost of me being a minority in our congregation, counting this cost doesn’t mean that there aren’t real lingering concerns that my wife and I continually discuss and pray through.

These concerns in large part involve the impact this could potentially have on our children. By choosing to plant this church and be a part of a congregation that isn’t currently very diverse, I am burdened by two specific concerns for my children, black kids in a white church.

 

Concern #1 – Being everyone’s black friends

My children are mixed, therefore, in the world’s eyes they are viewed as black. And because of the current demographic of our congregation, my concern is that at church my children will be the other kids’ black friends. That at parties and playdates, Sunday morning gatherings and prayer services, they’ll only have the opportunity to play with white kids. That they won’t get to look across the snack table and see someone else who looks like them. That their differences would be constantly highlighted, from skin color to hair texture.

My concern is that they’ll constantly stand out like a sore thumb, potentially either becoming color blind, not seeing themselves as black, or despising the beauty of God’s artistry in how He made them (Psalm 139:14) because they’re the only black kids.

 

Concern #2 – Assume that Christianity is (with a few exceptions) a white man’s religion

Because there isn’t much diversity in the church, specifically many Black Kids in a White Church, my second concern is that my children may assume Christianity is a white man’s religion with Daddy being an exception. That when they think of our church body, they think “white” and when they think of Daddy they think “different.” What we see, whether good or bad, shapes our perspective, whether it’s true or false. Cognitively, we know that perception isn’t reality, but oftentimes it becomes reality to us. My children could potentially conclude that God favors and loves white people more than people of any other ethnicity or that God doesn’t love them as much because he didn’t make them white. For my children, I’m concerned that they’ll draw this false conclusion about Christianity and therefore misunderstand God’s great design.

Though these concerns weigh heavily on my heart, they don’t have to stay there. I can find comfort in knowing that God cares about my cares and hope because God is at work saving a diverse people.

 

Action plan #1 – Cast cares

The Lord commands us to be anxious for nothing, but pray about everything (Philippians 4:6) and to cast our cares on Him because He cares about us (1 Peter 5:7). He gives us His listening ear to the cries and distresses of our heart as we pray and take refuge in Him (Psalm 62:5–8). Not only that, but the Lord alone has the power to bring more diversity to the church and children’s ministry and to prevent my children from believing lies about Christianity. Therefore, my wife and I pray about these matters. We also share these concerns with members in our congregation so that they may pray with us and for us regarding these matters.

 

Action Plan #2 – Expose to diversity

We intentionally invite to our dinner table Christians of different ethnicities. We want our children to know Christians who look like their dad and those who don’t look like either their mom or dad. We want them to see first-hand that Jesus died for a colorful bride. We try to spend more time with the other minorities the Lord has given our church so that our children can be around more people who look like Daddy.  We also have our children spend a good amount of time with another mixed kid in our congregation so that they may befriend and play with someone who does look like them.

We also intentionally read to them Christian books with good representation in the pictures. We love to read books like God Made Me and You by Shai Linne, God’s Very Good Idea by Trillia Newbell, and The Gospel in Color by Jarvis Williams. We want them to see in the resources we read that God’s people are a diverse people.

 

Ultimately, we pray for the salvation of our children and want them to know that though our local church isn’t very diverse, the church at large is diverse and, even more than that, heaven is diverse. There will be girls with ringlet curls and boys with light skin. That in the new heavens and the new earth there will be citizens of every tribe and language and people and nation (Revelation 5:9).

 


Prayer Requests:

  1. Pray that the Lord gives wisdom as Christians consider which local church they’ll join.
  2. Pray that church members would be sensitive to the concerns of the minorities in their congregation.
  3. Pray that the Lord would give more diversity to his churches
  4. Pray that local congregations would have a culture that’s conducive for diversity
  5. Pray that the Scriptures would shape the perspective of our children, not their experience.

 

Recent POdcasts

The Sufficiency of Scripture with Dr. Nate Brooks

The Sufficiency of Scripture with Dr. Nate Brooks

Sufficiency of Scripture Dr. Nate Brooks, professor at the Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary joins Austin today to talk about a few important doctrines of the Christian faith. The first is the sufficiency of Scripture and the second is God's common grace. How...

read more
Biblical Theology: Wisdom Literature

Biblical Theology: Wisdom Literature

Disagree Well Adrianna Anderson is back once again as we wrap up our study through the Old Testament. Today we're looking at the Wisdom Literature of the Old Testament. There is so much in here about how to live a righteous life, how to seek and acquire wisdom, and...

read more
Political Myth: Christian Nationalism

Political Myth: Christian Nationalism

Christian Nationalism Dr. Paul D. Miller is a professor at Georgetown University's school of foreign service. He is a veteran, patriot, and author of The Religion of American Greatness: What's Wrong with Christian Nationalism (IVP: 2022). Dr. Miller joins Austin today...

read more

Upcoming Events

Isaac-Adams-United-We-Pray-speaking-at-an-event

Click Here to View Now

Recent Articles

Dear White Woman

Dear White Woman

I don’t run at night or before the sun comes up. I wonder if you don’t either. While my husband can strap on a headlamp and reflectors and hit the neighborhood running, I have to be more cautious—even in the suburbs. Common sense tells women that running in the dark...

read more
Church, Diversity, and the Questions Kids Ask

Church, Diversity, and the Questions Kids Ask

A few years ago, our family attended an anniversary service for a good friend who pastored a church in our city. Like you would expect when visiting a church, we were greeted at the door by smiling faces and eager handshakes. People were excited to show us to our...

read more
The Pride of Jonah

The Pride of Jonah

Anyone who’s been in church long enough has probably heard the story of Jonah and the fish that swallowed him. As the story goes, God tells Jonah to deliver a message to the people in the city of Nineveh. But Jonah doesn’t want to. He attempts to run from this...

read more

We’d love to hear what you think about this article. Submit your feedback by clicking here to contact us.

Author

  • Joshua Chatman

    Joshua Chatman is the husband of Stephanie and father of their three kids. He serves as a Co-Pastor at Midtown Baptist Church in Memphis, TN. He has his MDiv from Southern Seminary, is passionate about family discipleship and loves training for half marathons.

    View all posts

Related Articles

Dear White Woman

Dear White Woman

Courtney Reissig shares her experience of choosing to run at specific times of day in order to stay safe. She reflects on her own privilege and how she might leverage that in service of her minority brothers and sisters.

read more
The Pride of Jonah

The Pride of Jonah

Anyone who’s been in church long enough has probably heard the story of Jonah and the fish that swallowed him. As the story goes, God tells Jonah to deliver a message to the people in the city of Nineveh. But Jonah doesn’t want to. He attempts to run from this...

read more

Stay Connected

Thanks to a generous grant, all donations to United? We Pray are being doubled through year-end.

A gift of any level will be matched at 100%,

doubling the impact of every single donation.

 

 

We humbly ask you to give today